Saturday, May 30, 2009

Old Chinese Wisdom




CHINESE PROVERBS



Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone.

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Man who run in front of car get tired.

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Man who run behind car get exhausted.

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Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.

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Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.

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Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok

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Man with one chopstick go hungry.

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Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails.

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Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.

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Baseball is wrong: man with four balls cannot walk.

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Panties not best thing on earth! But next to best thing on earth.

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War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.

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Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house.

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Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

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It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.

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Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.

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Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.

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Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.

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Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.

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Man who fart in church sit in own pew.

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Crowded elevator smell different to midget.

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Chinese Proverb:
"When someone shares something of value with you and you benefit from it, you have a moral obligation to share it with others."

13 comments:

Thom said...

These are just too funny. No piece at night, sit in on pew, one prick, all gone...too funny :)

The Old Fart said...

These are too funny, I read them all before but chuckled just as hard now as I did then.

Thank you for sharing

mq01 said...

excellent baron, thank you :)

Peter (Worldman): said...

I like the "piano", the "prune" and the "panties" one in particular. But they are all great and funny and a good medicine to start the week.

PS. I have noticed that you are visiting older posts of mine. Thank you. Also, you seem to be attracted by "my" red tram. I will, in the coming weeks make a post on some Swiss trams. You will be astounded to see what we do with them.

subrosa said...

I like these :) :)

Danny said...

"War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left."

Not the funniest but my favorite. I like the picture at the top. Unless I am mistaken it is several of the ways to express love in Chinese. My wife and I have the top left symbol tattooed on our arms.

Baron's Life said...

Thanks Thom...you might have seen some of these before...but they are funny

Baron's Life said...

Bill, yeah me too

Baron's Life said...

mq01 Thanks...have a great ride. I', jealous

Baron's Life said...

Peter...yeah they're good for a chuckle. I look forward to hear about the Swiss trams.

Baron's Life said...

Thanks Subrosa..hope you are better

Baron's Life said...

Danny, yeah that's philosophical enough....who's left
You are correct, it is the symbol of love in Chinese

A Lady's Life said...

lol too funny:)